Said goodbye to my blog for a while as a sign to myself to let life happen without documenting every detail of it. The same happened to my notebooks and my other blog.
Sitting at a Harvey's writing this as a sign of a rebirth to my new self.
Not that it is any different from what was before but there is a clear distinction between understanding and knowing.
I could understand a lot. Understanding is like looking at a painting and being able to tell features apart.
Knowing happens when one goes through the process of painting. Especially with a mentor.
Some understandings need some support to become powerful and fruitful. They are like blueprints. One knows what they are supposed to know and they can talk at any moment about the subjects to some extent. But the reality is the grooves of the brain are formed with the chisel, slowly through time.
In the process of getting to know, layers of understanding unfold each other in a way that it turns life into a classroom.
What was once on the front and was a reason for pain and suffering becomes a teacher for the singular point of consciousness, embodying in the physical form, as an I, to learn to let go of its i to become I. The I encompasses a range of colors, richer than what could think of alone.
The reality becomes a teacher, a self-repeating fractal form in which the experience becomes one with what is outside. It is a strange form of repeat. It is not a reflection by any means. Maybe to the other eye, it becomes a reflection at its best but the subjective experience becomes a channel of not knowing.
It is essentially a way of coping with the suffering. A paid suffering one must say. A repeated suffering which slowly turns into a problem to be solved and the way it is solved is surprisingly not through thinking. Thinking alone wants to eliminate suffering because it is underpowered due to suffering.
How is it solved?
That is what I have spent the last few months on it.
And it turned out to be through spending time
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