Order or disorder?
A sane mind chooses order over disorder. Maybe someone who has not seen the reality of what it is like to be in the hands of Mother Nature for a long time can choose disorder but order is the way when you get a taste of it.
But then it becomes a dynamic of where the order is cascading from? It simply boils down to the minds of the thinkers. A thinker is no one but one who has put thought into the order they are a part of. A very similar dynamic occurred when humans decided to change the order of mother nature. It does not mean Xe wanted to cut the connection, Xe was always dependent, but Xe wanted to be in a more thoughtful manner. Xe wanted a sort of small disorder to evolve the current order into something better. A better and lesser known order.
Xe does not understand but in terms of Xer existence. That means the highest order that can govern the world of Xe is nothing but the very fundamentals of Xer own being.
Xe states as long as Xe chooses to be, Xer interactions are the small disorders to the order of Xer world. The world naturally resists. An old layer needs to be shed, the egg needs to be hatched, and all is to make sure Xer will is strong enough and Xe is wise enough to face the world.
Without Xe, the world would not be imperfect. The world would not have an observer to see the creation and understand what can be changed. Xer comfort and Xer standards are the missing pieces of the world. Xer discomfort and sensitivity are how Xe understands the boundary between Xer being and the outside world.
Xe still does not know and prefers to not know. Xe sees glimpses of the future and the past which bothers Xer. Maybe from the past incarnation? Maybe from the time, the hot glass rod of understanding was inserted into the mind of his Chimp body by the overlords and for the first time, the eye of the mind on this biome opened to the everlasting horizon of time to the infinity. Maybe that exact time the first father saw everything. Everything that had yet to come and be. After thousands of years and segregation of genes, the mark still glows red and burns hot. Xe sometimes looks back and sees the gemstones and stained glass mosaic-shaped pieces of the mind and how the creator found it right to be like this. Xe trusts the imprisonment of being to be the way of God for the souls to find existence and to learn to pronounce existence - singularly. Xe trusts God for that and God shows Xe that the connection between Xer mind and the creation is one of a kind.
The more Xe is able to tolerate and witness, the more crystalline the world appears to be.
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