This loop

Living with this furry shrimp is teaching me a lot.

Like there is no shame in taking 18 naps a day. 

It’s hard to put in words but the same way the world revolves around our head, the same world revolves around their head. Their existence is a stable loop and they are the center of it. It collides with what we have here but they do have their separate existence and they do have to deal with it. 

It is giving me some perspective to me who now I see why I was running away from having life around me. I wanted to create life, I wanted to paint and write to get to the core of it. Somewhere where it all begins and expands but the more I dug deeper, the more I realized it is not a one persons job to be in this world and be functional in day time and be thinking about philosophy and creation afterwards without external help. The loop simply not stable.

In other words, ape not strong enough 

There is so much out there. If you are not in the right frequency you may end up burning too much for too little.

Trying to fix the world to feel better. 

This cat is the perfect example of fixing the world. By being himself and doing what he does, the world around him is advancing day by day and he doesn’t sweat doing hard work. He does give me emotional support and existential support and that is what matters. Doing the thing he is okay doing it.

When I look at him and I say to myself God looked at this hairy ball of breathing fur and said this animal also has to deal with death, something in my stomach hollows. Some kind of vaccum. Okay, if he has to do it, with his small body and small brain, there is no hope that the creation is anything easy to process. It is a crazy thought by a crazy creator who has signed for making matter alive and watching it die. It is a strange cycle.

But at the same time it gives me confidence. If he can do it and he can go through life I can also do it. As hard as it sometimes seems to be. 

If he needs to take 18 naps and be judged by me, he does it to make it go through. It is a perceived behaviour but he does not have shame doing it. Why would there be a predefined structure to the acceptable behaviour of beings? Why would there be an ideal, a standard, an acceptable form? 

Looking at him and how he manages his life, I see only instinct and doing what needs to be done. It is not just basic survival behaviour if he can be with me in a place of need and make me manage my repressed thoughts. It is a service.

And how can an animal be capable of serving a human psychologically? 

Only if the primary material of life is energy and whomever is sensitive to it and able to understand and process it, can be in help for any other living being. 

Maybe this is the universal language for talking to aliens not frequency tones or hieroglyphic symbols, if a cat can manage symbolic humans, humans can also manage transcendent aliens.